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Prom Night (2008)

DVD Cover (Sony Home Entertainment Unrated)
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Overall Rating 32%
Overall Rating
Ranked #2,746
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Connections: Prom Night

Donna's senior prom is supposed to be the best night of her life, one of magic, beauty, and love. Surrounded by her best friends, she should be safe from the horrors of her dark past. But when the night turns from magic to murder there is only one man who could be responsible, the man she thought was gone forever. Now, Donna and her friends must find a way to escape the sadistic rampage of an obsessed killer, and survive their Prom Night. --IMDb
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Review by bluemeanie
Added: April 14, 2008
Some films defy all explanation. Some films turn out to be not only as bad as you thought, but also as dreadful as you could ever imagine. Such is "Prom Night", the latest in a long line of ill advised horror remakes that tests the limits of audience stupidity like never before. The only reason I went to see the film was because I was hoping for some mindless entertainment - a bunch of pretty people getting slashed and dashed and the occasional fake scare. "Prom Night" can't even manage to deliver on those minuscule promises. The pretty people seem second rate. The fake scares are so poorly executed they seem by way of Renny Harlin. "Prom Night" goes out of its way to make horror as timid as possible. In a few years, scientists will look back over the course of cinematic history and they'll come across "Prom Night" somewhere in their vaults. After reviewing the film, they will immediately walk into the vault and lock themselves in, so there is no chance of them ever having to sit through it again. Even the original "Prom Night" was garbage, and if remakes have taught us one thing - you can't make chicken salad out of chicken shit. "Prom Night" is the worst films of 2008 and one of the worst horror remakes ever. Watch out "Black Christmas".

Can you guess what this picture is about from the title? The film opens with a dream sequence that seems like reality but is not. We are introduced to Donna Keppel (Brittany Snow), whose parents and brother are killed by a former science teacher turned homicidal stalker, Richard Fenton (Johnathon Schaech). The madman is locked up and Donna is sent to live with her aunt and uncle while Mr. Crazy cools it in the hooskow. Then comes prom night and Donna's former teacher turned killer has escaped from his hospital. Donna is horrified that she is having nightmares again but excited about the idea of wearing the color champagne. Her hot little boyfriend, Bobby (Scott Porter), and she have an awkward little moment when he picks her up, and by awkward I mean their performances. The usual assortment of high school friends are thrown into the mix, including Lisa (Dana Davis) who wants to be Prom Queen, Ronnie (Collins Pennie) who wants to get laid, Claire (Jessica Stroup) who wants her boyfriend to stop being a dick, and Michael (Kelly Blatz), who looks like a hybrid between David Arquette and Shia LeBeouf. They are all, of course, hacked to death, one at a time, until someone realizes something is wrong. Cue the local detective, Detective Winn (Edris Elba), who is hellbent on saving the girl and capturing the killer. What results is a roller coaster ride...strike that...a ride on the neighborhood seesaw.

First off - no prom night has ever been this exciting. And why in the hell are there people standing behind barricades at the prom, almost like they are paparazzi waiting to catch a glimpse of these horrible, wretched little actors? And since when did one member of a hotel staff care so much about another member of the hotel staff that they went on a mission to find them? Give me a break. And, of course, the hotel maids name would be Maria. Go figure. My favorite scene comes when the lead character's aunt (Jessalyn Gilsig) is in the kitchen and is watching her husband and the detective talk about the escape of the killer. She is holding a dish. A breakable dish. My friends and I were in the audience chanting "Drop it! Drop it! Drop it!" and - sure enough - she not only drops the dish - but she drops it in slow motion. Now, that's drama. And how many fake scares are we supposed to tolerate before something happens? How many times can one character bump into a lamp or an ottoman or a fucking hanging lantern. It's ridiculous. And where is the blood? Every time we see a dead body, there is either no wound whatsoever or the blood looks like a small container of acrylic paint leaked out onto them. No horror. No gore. No nothing. This is probably due to the fact that two Disney films were trailered before the film began. How many horror films have Disney trailers attached to them. The PG-13 rating wasn't the reason why this film was so damned terrible, but it didn't help that the most gore we saw was that hideous scar on Brittany Snow's forehead. It was the star of the film. No one else. Just that damned scar.

As for the performances, what is there to say? Brittany Snow is beyond awful. I have always found her to be bland and uninspired and she keeps that streak alive with such a painful performance. And, seriously - if you're going to have a lead actress with a scar on her forehead, either use make-up to cover it up or make sure you don't use so many close-ups. Scott Porter, who is usually so charismatic on "Friday Night Lights", has the personality of a wet moth here. He has no purpose in the film and his character gets to do nothing. Edris Elba does the whole 'determined black man' routine throughout and it gets old right out of the gate. Even Johnathon Schaech seems lost here, and he is usually solid, even in lackluster pictures. He goes from looking like Charles Manson to looking like Harry Connick, Jr. and he instantly loses all ability to be scary. And, I have to mention one of the worst death scenes in horror movie history, when a hotel worker (Joshua Leonard from "The Blair Witch Project") goes looking for 'Maria" and gets killed - that death scream sent the entire audience into a laugh riot - yes, it was that bad. The filmmakers seemed to think they could skip all the blood and gore and just replace them with really dramatic death screams.

You get the picture? "Prom Night" is atrocious. I want to go and find Brittany Snow, give her the number of a good dermatologist and tell her never to act again. Ever. Then I want to find the producers of this film and hit them. Hard. As hard as they can stand it. "Prom Night" treats the audience like their intelligence level is on par with the characters in the film. That might be true if everyone in the audience had down syndrome. Now, I have always said that it makes more sense to remake bad horror films than good ones, and I stick by that statement, but the fact that the remake of "Prom Night" could turn out to be worse than the original is just beyond comprehension. There is someone who needs to be shot for this. However, the film was number one at the box office over the weekend, so I am sure the success of the film will just ensure another wave of horror remakes to hit theatres over the next couple of years. Are fifteen-year-olds so starved for entertainment that a piece of garbage like "Prom Night" becomes so satisfying? Mark my words - "Prom Night" will make my end of the year list as one of the worst. "Prom Night" - its date canceled.

0/10.
Nirrad #1: Nirrad - added April 14, 2008 at 2:03pm
Haven't seen this movie, and hopefully never will. Although I'm pretty pissed on how much it made at the box office over the weekend. Damn movie opened up with $22.7 million domestic. There really are a lot of dumb people out there.
Edd #2: Edd - added April 15, 2008 at 7:53pm
Was there any doubt in any MvMMDI user's mind that this was pure garbage? What a fucking terrible excuse for a movie. Hell, what a terrible excuse for a waste of time.
Anthony Spadaccini #3: Anthony Spadaccini - added October 17, 2008 at 11:36am
I'm hugely critical of movies, especially "PG-13 horror" (which in most cases is an oxymoron).

However, I didn't exactly find this to be all that terrible.

I did hate the completely unrealistic prom setting (no high school in their right mind would spend that much money to make a prom look like a Hollywood premiere).

Everyone complained about the lack of blood/gore, but there was more carnage candy in this than in some R-rated horror films from the 80s.

Of course, I watched the "unrated" version (whatever that means) and it was late at night, so maybe my judgment was a little skewed here.
bluemeanie #4: bluemeanie - added October 17, 2008 at 4:05pm
Worst. Horror. Remake. Ever.
Tristan #5: Tristan - added October 17, 2008 at 4:17pm
Considering the source material, I'm not the least bit surprised.
Crispy #6: Crispy - added February 28, 2009 at 3:58am
Bump the rating to R; add some more gore and gratuitous nudity, and this movie might be able to move up into the realm of mediocre.
Chad #7: Chad - added July 6, 2009 at 6:00am
I expected a horrible movie, but this exceeded my expectations. Holy Jesus, was this movie a joke? Was it intentionally bad - I mean, did somebody purposefully try to make the worst horror movie ever?

1/10, and I'm only giving it that one point because I laughed my fool head off when A FUCKING LAMP snuck up on Brittany Snow.
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