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Zombie Lake (1981)

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Overall Rating 31%
Overall Rating
Ranked #6,274
...out of 20,319 movies
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Genres / Traits: Horror Zombie Film Nazis

In a small village, somewhere in France, German soldiers, killed and thrown into the lake by the Resistance during WW II, come back. --IMDb
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Review by Chad
Added: November 15, 2003
So I was looking for Burial Ground on ebay, put down my bid, and it showed that "this seller is also selling" deal. This guy was also selling this DVD, for a grand ol' $4. Had never heard of it, so looked up some info on it. Found a site about it, basically saying it's a retched piece of shit, and that was good enough for me, so I bought it.

Lots of T&A + bush + box shots? Yes. Loads of this. Otherwise, it's pretty much a drag throughout. The back-story on the lake went about 20 minutes, when they could have condensed it down to 3 or so. We see a German soldier banging a French chick, during WWII.... yes, that's correct.... and then he heads back out to war. What seems like only a day or so, the way the movie moved, he came back to her house, and found that chick had had a baby. "We'll call her Helena!" Without a word, he runs back out to war. He dies, and at the same moment, so does the chick. This whole bit took up 20 minutes of the movie time.

So anywho. Storyline was pretty shit. This town killed a bunch of Nazi's, dumped them in the lake, and now they come back for blood. Sounds decent, but the execution of it was horrid.

Gore: The gore was, quite simply, a joke. How hard is it to whip up some realistic looking blood? On the first kill, it looks like a gallon of water, with a pinch of red dye. Second kill, it looks nice. Around the end, it looks exactly like tomato soup, clumps and all. This was a foreign flick made during the Shlock era, so I was hoping for some nice effects. Nope, not even a gaping neck wound.... all we got was some blood smeared on, with (very obviously) no punctures.

Continuity? HA! The little girl is luring her zombie dad into a house, and she lights a torch, because it's so dark outside. Cut scene to inside the house, where she's still luring him in, and it's bright and sunny outside.... and sadly, this is only one example.

Zombies: Complete ass. They didn't even try with the makeup jobs, just some green paint on the face and hands (they missed the necks & arms, though). During the very first kill, the chick swipes the zombies face, and knocks loose a big chunk of the paint, so it's just hanging off.... I guess this could be considered "flesh" storyline-wise, so yeah.

Overall, this doesn't quite beat out Sleepy Hollow High for worst movie ever, but ranks up there. 2/10 for loads of beaver.
Ginose #1: Ginose - added February 19, 2007 at 10:37pm
Fuck you, "Zombie Lake". Fuck you. I spent $7 for this shit feast... I wanted to kill myself. -3/10... no negatives? 0/10, then.
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