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Inbred Redneck Vampires (2004)

DVD Cover (Sub Rosa Studios Reissue)
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5.9
 / 10
3 votes
Genres:
Hixploitation, Horror, Horror Comedy, Vampire Film
Directors:
Michael Hegg Michael Hegg
Joe Sherlock Joe Sherlock
Starring:
Dee Alsman Dee Alsman
Emily Andrews Emily Andrews
Erin Arbogast Erin Arbogast
Shannon Barksdale Shannon Barksdale
Sha Boseley Sha Boseley
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Review by Chad
Added: August 29, 2010
Inbred Redneck Vampires (formerly known as Bloodsucking Redneck Vampires) is a movie that I put off watching for a couple of weeks. It did sound like an intriguing movie, don't get me wrong, but there's just something about the combination of "ultra low-budget" and "vampire flick" that drives me batty. Perhaps it's the fact that a cheesy vampire film is almost as easy as a horrific zombie film in terms of easy-to-create trash destined for the bargain bin, or maybe it's simply because I strongly dislike vampire films in general. Granted, mixing in some comedy along with the redneck angle did prompt me to put it in my to-watch pile, but to say that I was expecting something memorable... well, it did take me a while to get around to actually throwing the disc into my player, but here we are.

There are two separate storylines taking place here, and the brighter readers will realize that they will undoubtedly come together further into the running time. The main storyline takes place in the small country town of Backwash, where we meet up with Ma Poissier (Carrie Davis), her cucumber-loving daughter Eva (Lindsey A. Hope), and her redneck-epitomized son Lil' Junior (Rob Merickel). The three are preparing for the annual Tripe Day cook-off and beauty pageant when fate steps in... or more accurately, when interior decorator Jean-Claude Les Eaux (Scott Shanks) steps in. As it turns out, Ma won a contest sponsored by a little rag known as Bull Insemination Monthly, and her prize comes courtesy of our flaming Frenchman who promises to redecorate any room in their cozy little shack. Of course, once Jean-Claude gets a look at what he's up against, he's tempted to run away as fast as his little legs will carry him... and when he gets suckered into spending his days with Junior and his midget drinking buddy Cletus (Bill Bradford), things really start to get nasty.

Meanwhile, centuries-old vampire Catherine (Felicia Pandolfi) and her human lackey Lendel (Warren E.B.B.) are on the run from a certain vampire hunter, when Catherine comes up with the brilliant idea of invading a small town, biting a few people, and letting them turn each other into vampires; naturally, all of these undead minions will be under her direct control, and what better way to fight off a vampire hunter than with a whole town's worth of bloodsuckers? Oh, and guess which town she picks to infect? Unfortunately for her, these people aren't too bright and they don't make very good vampires. Fun times all around.

Personally, I found Inbred Redneck Vampires to be hilarious, but I'm going to throw a disclaimer on that: if you don't enjoy redneck jokes, sheep-fucking, shower-peeping, gay jokes, farting contests, or any other manner of low-brow humor, then you may disagree with me there. In fact, that sort of thing makes up the vast majority of the movie, so if you were one of those humorless souls who raised your hand, you may as well stop reading this review right now: this is not the movie for you. If, however, the thought of seeing a drunken redneck midget wearing nothing but a pair of boxers and thick layer of body hair squaring off against his equally drunken but fully-sized drinking buddy and an effeminate Frenchy in a farting contest, you've found a movie that might get bumped to the top of your Netflix queue (and just to reaffirm my personal opinion, I had tears rolling down my face during that scene).

As I mentioned above, Inbred Redneck Vampires is a low-budget affair - very low-budget. The humor is what drives the movie, so if you go in expecting anything more than ketchup on the neck and bargain bin vampire teeth, then you will certainly walk away disappointed. Yes, the special effects are anything but special, but where else can you see a vampire killed by the ass of a five-hundred pound nude woman named One-Eyed Lurlene (Sha Boseley)? Where else will you witness the Mouse Trap-inspired staking of not one, but two bloodsucking varmints? You won't be wowed by the special effects, but you will be laughing at the absurdity that prompts their display.

Overall, I'm giving Inbred Redneck Vampires a thumbs up. Sure, the special effects are lacking... but the humor makes up for it. Granted, some of the acting is atrocious... but some of it is actually pretty good, given the nature of the release. It's not high art, but if you enjoy poking fun at our Southern friends or if you know what tripe is without looking it up, then you may get as much entertainment out of this one as I did. 8/10.
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