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Psycho Santa (2003)

DVD Cover (Sub Rosa Studios)
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Overall Rating 20%
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Ranked #11,634
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Genres / Traits: Horror Slasher Film Christmas

Connections: Psycho Santa

While en route to a holiday gathering, young Ron teases his wife about the legend of a backwoods Santa with an axe to grind. However, when the legend comes to life, the Christmas bash turns into a holiday bloodbath! --TMDb
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Review by Chad
Added: December 25, 2011
Christmas is finally here. The kids are playing with their ill-gotten gains, dinner is in the oven, and there's a blanket of good cheer over the entire household. So, I decided to pop in a shitty Christmas flick to wrap up the holidays, and this time around, we're watching the second movie on the Satan Claus / Psycho Santa double feature. As you may have saw, I wasn't much of a fan of the other movie, so I had pretty low expectations from this one. I can't say that I was totally wrong there, but I will say that this one was the better of the bunch.

We begin with a loving couple - Ron (Jeff Samford) and Jess (Michelle Samford) - driving to a friend's Christmas party out in the middle of nowhere. Along the way, Ron decides to tell his wife about the serial killing Santa Claus that has been plaguing this section of town. As shown through numerous flashbacks, we watch as a pair of strippers and possible lesbians (Sequoia Rose Fuller and Rachel Michelle Gnapp) have a little holiday fun at a remote cabin before meeting the aforementioned serial killer. We then learn that this particular Santa is an escapee from a mental hospital that burned down years ago. You see, everyone thought that he had died in the fire, but no, he was just horribly burned - he left and went home to his parents, who locked him up in an attempt to keep him from resuming his murderous ways. A pair of burglars find this out the hard way, and we then move on to a few more flashbacks before our storytelling heroes arrive at the party and... well, what do you think happens?

Psycho Santa is a hit and miss affair. On the positive side of things, it has a pretty good storyline. It's nothing terribly brilliant or even original, but for a holiday-themed slasher flick, it does what it is supposed to do and keeps us entertained. There are some decent effects (I liked the look of Santa's burnt face), the acting is acceptable (again, not great, but acceptable), and there are even a couple of scenes that were downright memorable. I particularly enjoyed the ending of the "lesbian strippers" scene, where they discover the grisly remains of their friend in a very unique way.

The thing that really kills the movie is the padding... my word, the padding. You see, there's only about thirty minutes of solid material in this movie, but it runs for a total of eighty minutes. This leaves us with almost an hour of fluff, and trust me, that hour drags by in an almost painful fashion. That "lesbian stripper" scene? Alright, I'll give that one a pass: it's twenty minutes worth of gratuitous shower scene / negligee dancing, so the guys will like it. Then, we move to the burglar scene, and I shit you not, it takes those two guys at least five minutes to walk across a lawn. It takes them another couple of minutes to open the door and another five or ten minutes to rummage through the house, and from there, we move on to the next scene... which is just as heavily padded.

This padding garbage is the pattern for the movie, and it's a shame, because there really was a decent slasher flick hiding in here. Cutting this down to a thirty-minute short would make for a great time in front of the tube for fans of b-movie slashers, but unfortunately, that's not how things worked out and we are left with a movie that is almost a chore to get through. Check it out if you really want to see yet another Christmas horror flick, but don't expect to be blown away... just disappointed at what could have been. 5/10.
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