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42%
Overall Rating
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Ranked #18,926
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Discover what really goes on behind closed doors and on the street corners as True Confessions Of Hookers Caught On Tape reveals first hand accounts straight from the woman who are out there every night. This uncensored video captures the real story of hookers from major cities around America, caught on tape whether they know it or not!
--Amazon
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Review by Chad
Added: August 12, 2007
False advertising is something that us movie lovers have grown accustomed to over the years, and sadly enough, we've actually come to expect it from most releases. Take the zombie subgenre of horror, for example: each of these films proclaims to be bloodier, better, and scarier than all of the classics combined, but most of them turn out to be nothing more than a bunch of kids running around in the backyard with some of their mom's makeup slathered on their faces. That's okay though, because we've come to expect nothing less from the genre, and when one turns out to be decent, it's a pleasant surprise for us watching at home. Then we have the softcore genre: these films come complete with storylines and promises of exciting adventures, but most of these offerings turn out to be nothing more than boobfests and fish markets. That's okay though, because with titles like House on Hooter Hill and The Erotic Diary of Misty Mundae, it should be obvious what you're going to get when you pop that disc into your DVD player.
Then we have "films" like True Confessions of Hookers Caught on Tape that take the term "false advertising" to an entirely new level. Let me just copy the back of the DVD case here so that you fine readers can see exactly what I mean. This description comes straight from the DVD case with no editing by yours truly:
See how and why prostitution is the Oldest Profession known to man. This series goes far beyond "TAXI CAB Confessions." You'll see everything from Cheap Tricks to $10,000-A-Night Hookers.
These girls will shock and arouse you, as they expose the inside secrets of the trade. One girl argues "What's the difference... Marriage is legal prostitution".
You'll see ups and downs with the PIMPS & the JOHNS, what kind of sex they like and don't like, and how far they would actually go for money. As Seen On TV... publicized and unauthorized, this film is fast, erotic and out of control.
Now, I enjoyed Taxicab Confessions back in the day, and I love witnessing the seedier side of humanity in shows such as Cops (a guilty pleasure of mine). What could be better than watching these over-the-hill whores go at it with overweight men while talking about how much dick they'd suck for another hit of crack? Who wouldn't want to watch these women show off their banged-up goods for the camera while doing nothing to conceal their prison tattoos and needle marks? It sounded like an exploitation-lovers' dream, and as you can see from the title being listed on this site, I plunked down my cash for it.
The front of the DVD case says True Confessions of Hookers Caught on Tape and features a picture of a prostitute bending over to discuss prices with a potential customer. The back of the DVD case says True Confessions of Hookers Caught on Tape and features the text found up above along with two pictures: one of a good-looking woman showing off her boobs and another of an older gentleman getting some oral action from two skanky ladies. The disc itself says True Confessions of Hookers Caught on Tape. The DVD menu says True Confessions of Hookers Caught on Tape. The post-menu / pre-movie screen says True Confessions of Hookers Caught on Tape. So, I'm pretty sure that I actually received True Confessions of Hookers Caught on Tape and that I didn't wind up with the wrong disc or something like that. When the movie started, however, I didn't see a single hooker (in the traditional sense of the word) and nor did I hear any confessions. What the hell!?
So, what do you get out of this package? You get to see five women show off their goods in what I refer to as "hard softcore" (no sex, but the ladies have no problems with showing off pink holes and brown stars) while telling us things such as "I want to change the world, one dick at a time" and "I was born down south, so I guess that makes me a southern belle." That's it: there's no pimps here, there's no johns, there's no money exchanging hands, no prostitute confessions, and in fact, the word "prostitute" (or any of its synonyms) isn't used at all throughout the running time. Also, these ladies aren't exactly models, but it's quickly apparent that they're not hookers as they look exactly like the ladies one would find in any softcore offering.
True Confessions of Hookers Caught on Tape my ass: this has to be the most deceitful movie that I have ever come across, and trust me when I say that I've seen a lot of deceit in my day. Fuck this movie, fuck the people who made it, fuck the women who appeared in it, and fuck the television stations that advertised it. 0/10.
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