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52%
Overall Rating
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Ranked #14,357
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A writer, a producer, and a director are having a meeting to discuss and plan scenes for their current film project: The story of Liz Adams, who has come to New York to seek fame and fortune through the theatre.
--IMDb
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Review by Chad
Added: January 30, 2008
The recently released DVD release of The Sexperts from Retro-Seduction Cinema - which just so happens to be the only home video release of the film - comes with a damned fine set of liner notes that briefly discusses the history of both the film at hand and those who were responsible for bringing it to us. I won't cover the specifics here, but one telling part of these notes is when it's mentioned that producer William Mishkin was the man with the money here, as Mishkin just so happened to be a man who was notorious for promising all sorts of debauchery on his posters and press materials while delivering... well, let's just say that in the history of deceptive marketing, this man has his very own page. This is a man who routinely imported European films, inserted a couple of hardcore scenes into them, and released them to grindhouses under sleazy new titles while promising that audiences would be shocked and astounded at the content found within. So, with this in mind, it should come as no surprise that The Sexperts promises a lot, but when all is said and done, it's barely delivered a damned thing.
Truth be told, the film is more of an overly-dramatized soap opera than a steamy sexploitation piece. The storyline is told by way of three Hollywood filmmakers sitting in an office discussing the script for their upcoming picture, and the fruits of their discussions are what we at home watch as the minutes tick by. Their storyline entails a young woman named Liz (Lana Lynn) who travels to the city with hopes of making it big in the movie business, and there, she meets Connie (Rusty Allen), a woman she will eventually share an apartment with. The two women soon discover that they have very different ways of handling their affairs; Connie is a good girl with dreams of eventually settling down with her boyfriend, while Liz wants nothing more than to make it to the top regardless of what (or who) she has to do to get there. It's a perfect setup for a sexploitation piece, but sadly, the best we get is a couple of booby shots, some prolonged kissing, and a make out session at a beatnik party. Showing up in a minor role is Audrey Campbell, who lovers of exploitation fare may recognize as Olga herself.
Alright, so there's not much going on here in terms of actual sexploitation, but to be fair, I completely omitted the nudie loops that were inserted in post-production. You see, the filmmakers probably realized that the amount of actual sexploitation was ridiculously low even by Mishkin's standards, so before releasing the film, they inserted a trio of colorized loops throughout the running time. Do they add to the plot? Not really, other than the fact that they're presented as the writer's envisionment of how the film would look in Eastmancolor, although I have to say that the ladies starring in these loops looked suspiciously unlike anyone who was actually starring in the film. Yes, they're just random ladies inserted to up the T&A count, but what else would you expect from a film such as this?
Otherwise, the film is a bid tedious to get through and is tame even by the standards of the sixties. We watch as Liz makes out with Connie's boyfriend and pretends that they were just practicing for an upcoming play, Connie gets both jealous and envious of Liz's brazenness, the two ladies hook up with an older gentleman who sports a fat wallet and proceed to spend a day on the beach (gratuitous bikini shots!), they attend a cocktail party, the old fellow dumps his former mistress for Liz, and the whole thing feels like more of a daytime soap opera than a raunchy sexploitation classic.
It may not have been a very good film, but it does have its place in the history of the genre - just look at the names attached to it for proof of that. However, the real meat of the DVD package comes to us courtesy of the extras found within the set. For starters, we've got a bonus second disc with eleven nudie loops straight out of the sixties in addition to the four found on the main disc. Also included are a handful of commercials that Audrey Campbell appeared in, and while these may not mean much to those of you who have no clue who the woman was, they were definitely a sight to see for those of us who do. Here's a hint: imagine watching, say, Ellen Page hawking floor wax and chairs with a huge shit-eating grin on her face and you'll get an idea as to how novel these commercials really were.
Still, even with these extras, I can't very well give the actual film a high rating as I simply didn't get a whole lot of enjoyment out of it. Completists will probably want to add it to their collection, but everyone else should probably look elsewhere for their vintage smut. 3/10.
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