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Wrath Of The Titans (2012)

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Overall Rating 57%
Overall Rating
Ranked #996
...out of 20,319 movies
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Connections: Clash Of The Titans

A decade after his heroic defeat of the monstrous Kraken, Perseus-the demigod son of Zeus-is attempting to live a quieter life as a village fisherman and the sole parent to his 10-year old son, Helius. Meanwhile, a struggle for supremacy rages between the gods and the Titans. Dangerously weakened by humanity's lack of devotion, the gods are losing control of the imprisoned Titans and their ferocious leader, Kronos, father of the long-ruling brothers Zeus, Hades and Poseidon. The triumvirate had overthrown their powerful father long ago, leaving him to rot in the gloomy abyss of Tartarus, a dungeon that lies deep within the cavernous underworld. Perseus cannot ignore his true calling when Hades, along with Zeus' godly son, Ares, switch loyalty and make a deal with Kronos to capture Zeus. The Titans' strength grows stronger as Zeus' remaining godly powers are siphoned, and hell is unleashed on earth. Enlisting the help of the warrior Queen Andromeda, Poseidon's demigod son, Argenor, and fallen god Hephaestus, Perseus bravely embarks on a treacherous quest into the underworld to rescue Zeus, overthrow the Titans and save mankind. --IMDb
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Review by Crispy
Added: August 25, 2012
The original Clash of the Titans was one of my favorite movies growing up, so obviously I wasn't happy when they announced the remake a few years ago. Still, I wasn't surprised; this is an age of remakes after all. With that said, even I didn't think they would kick out a sequel.

Ten years have passed since Perseus used Medusas's head to kill the Kraken, and he's returned to the simple life of a fisherman. His wife Io has died (again), but not before giving him a son named Helius. Unfortunately, the man is once again forced to trade fishing net for sword as Hades and Ares have joined forces and waged war against the rest of the Pantheon. Zeus has been captured and the remaining gods killed, but Poseidon has just enough strength to warn Perseus that they are planning on resurrecting the father of the gods, Kronos, and that Ares has a personal vendetta against him as their father, Zeus, clearly favored the mortal. In his dying breath, Poseidon gives him his trident and tells him to find his own son, Agenor. Together, the two demigods seek out the blacksmith of the gods, Hephaestus, where they learn the key to victory is by combining the three weapons of the elder gods. They have Poseidon's trident, but Hades' pitchfork and Zeus' thunderbolt are in the hands of the two Gods trying to kill them.

As can be expected, Wrath of the Titans pretty much runs exactly like the remade Clash of the Titans. You see, the original Clash had a heart that this new series just flat out doesn't. Through both quests, Perseus just seems to be caught up in things with no real motivation, plus Sam Worthington isn't exactly the most charismatic of people. So it's a guy you don't care about doing things you're not even sure HE cares about; it's not exactly a formula for riveting television. OK sure, maybe a quest to save the life of the woman you love isn't exactly original, but it works. And like I said in my Clash review, while the clay animated monsters didn't look real per se, they had a personality that these new CGI creatures just can't convey in their quick-cut, flash-in-the-pan glory. Like everything else, there's just no soul behind them. The gods are also painfully underdeveloped. Watching Zeus and Hades go to battle should have been an amazing scene, but they just walk around using force push. It's depressing.

Greek mythology has always been incredibly popular, and the genre's monsters are one of its main selling points, so I'd like to address the beasties here. Throughout the running time, Perseus squares off against a chimera, a family of cyclops, a minotaur, Kronos and his minions, the Makhai. The chimera is a two-headed fire-breathing creature, one lion and one goat, with a viper for a tail. On the one hand, I loved how they handled the fire breathing aspect. It doesn't breathe fire in the traditional sense, instead the "goat" head is constantly drooling/spraying a napalm-esque liquid which the "lion" head ignites with the sparks it breathes. It brought a nice twist to the two-headed monster. On the other, I wasn't crazy about the decision to make it look like a burn-covered demon. Sometimes less is more, and they would have been a lot better served staying closer to its animal base. The minotaur was another creature doomed through too much creativity. It's basically been reduced to an overgrown human with fangs and bull horns. It was a terrible decision, and the direction behind its fight scene was even worse. Cyclops are pretty straight-forward; if you give them one eye you pretty much nailed it. That leaves the grand daddy of them all, Kronos and his Makhai. The father of the gods was one of the biggest disappointments in the movie. He's always been portrayed as a borderline feral old man, not some giant volcano. I mean, look at this painting by Peter Paul Rubens. Does that in any way make you think of a giant lavaman throwing magma around? Of course not. At least his Makhai warriors looked good.

Like everything else, the actors leave a lot to be desired as well. I've covered Worthington, and the fact that he's almost completely fallen off the map since his quick flashbang a few years ago should speak volumes. His partner-in-crime, Toby Kebbell does his best to channel Russel Brand, which is never something you want to hear. Replacing Alexa Devalos as Andromeda is Rosamunda Pike. While she wasn't bad per se, I really didn't like how they retooled the character into an overly cheerful woman. Plus, would it have killed them to at least try and keep some continuity between the actresses and dyed her hair brown? As for the gods, Bill Nighy seemed to recognize how dumb the movie was and tried to make the best of it. You can tell he was having a ball as Hephaestus, but it really didn't help Wrath's case. Finally, I'm not sure what dirty secret Liam Neeson and Ralph Fiennes are hiding, but hopefully after two of these movies the blackmail will end.

Like its predecessor, Wrath of the Titans is loud, flashy and empty. It serves its purpose I guess, but there are a metric shit-ton of other flicks that do it better. 4/10.
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