Zombies vs. Strippers (2012)

DVD Cover (Full Moon Pictures)
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The Tough Titty is a strip club that's seen better days. Spider has been losing money on his business for years. Now it's finally getting the traffic he's always wanted... unfortunately, most of his patrons are undead. --IMDb
Review by Chad
Added: April 26, 2013
What is it with all the zombies versus strippers movies that have been coming out in recent years? Off the top of my head, we've had Zombie Strippers, Zombies! Zombies! Zombies!, and even the Japanese got in on it with Big Tits Zombie... and that's definitely not a definitive list as I've seen a few others mentioned that aren't reviewed on this site. Replace the zombies with werewolves or other horror movie staples and the genre opens up even more. So, here we are once again, this time with Zombies Vs. Strippers, a movie that comes to us with the same general plot that all of these releases use. While it may be lacking in originality, it does come to us courtesy of Charles Band and Full Moon Studios, so how bad could it possibly be?

The entire film takes place at The Tough Titty, a strip club run by a charming fellow named Spider (Circus-Szalewski), and it doesn't take long for us to figure out that this club is in rough shape. The girls are attractive, the bar is well-stocked, and the music choices are solid, but there simply aren't any customers... and there haven't been for a long time. In fact, it's been so long that Spider is selling the place off, and this is the last night that the place will be open. What better way to go out than with a big employee-only party? Joining in are strippers Sugar (Eve Mauro), Bambi (Victoria Levine), Jasmine (Adriana Sephora), and Vanilla (Brittany Gael Vaughn), along with club bouncer Marvin (J. Scott), bartender Bobby (Don Baldaramos), and DJ Bern (Tanner Horn).

The booze is flowing and the boobs are jiggling, but it wouldn't be much of a movie if it just ended there. That is when Spike (Adam Brooks), the frontman for hardcore band Nancy Reagan's Vagina, bursts into the club with a crazy story: it seems that a riot broke out at the club where he and his band were performing, he robbed the place in the chaos, and then headed here. What was an employee-only affair quickly makes way for one guest when Spike reveals that he is ready to blow sixteen grand on lapdances. His story of flesh-eating maniacs and mass chaos outside may be a little frightening, but that money would keep the place in business and do a lot to line everybody's pockets. I think you see where we're going with this. Insert plenty of stripping action, a handful of zombie attacks, a bible-thumbing biker gang led by Red Wings (Brad Potts), and yes, even a zombie clown, and you have Zombies Vs. Strippers.

This is a guilty pleasure movie if there ever was one, let's get that out of the way now. On paper, it should have been awful: the acting is atrocious, the zombie and gore effects are lackluster, and even though the movie runs just over an hour, there are scenes that just go on a little too long. However, it's not without its charm, and fans of bad b-movies will know exactly what I mean. It's true that you can't call it a classic and it's also true that you could point out numerous technical flaws, but at the end of the day, it is an entertaining movie. It's got some likable characters, some funny one-liners, a couple of decent zombie kills, and... alright, I doubt many women are interested in this movie based on the title alone, so guys? Yeah, three out of those four ladies show off their boobies in almost every scene of the movie.

I also have to say that I enjoyed the characters. Now, there's a difference between me saying "acting" and "characters" there, because I'll be honest, the acting isn't all that great. With that said, there are a lot of enjoyable characters here and they all work surprisingly well together. Circus-Szalewski is probably the best of the bunch as bar-owner Spider, and watching his dealings with both his staff and the other people who enter his establishment is always entertaining and often hilarious. I also got a huge Bruce Campbell vibe off of him in this one, so Evil Dead fans will enjoy him even more. Brad Potts is also excellent as the leader of the biker gang, and watching this well-spoken badass take charge of the situation is enjoyable as all hell. I'll even say that the strippers were pretty entertaining as characters - again, I'm not going to give any of them "best actress" nods, but each of them managed to bring some laughs along with their, uh, other goods.

So, even though it does a lot of things wrong, it also does a lot of things right and is pretty entertaining as a result. It's not a horror classic and it's not even the best in the "zombies versus strippers" genre, but the title tells you everything that you need to know about this movie... and if it sounds like something you'd be interested in, chances are good that you'll like it. You want a movie that will scare the shit out of you or raise the tension levels? How about a creative take on the zombie genre? Look elsewhere. However, if you want a cheesy b-movie with plenty of boobs, jokes, zombies, and blood (in that order), then give it a shot. 6/10.
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