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Shark Attack 3: Megalodon (2002)

DVD Cover (Lions Gate)
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Overall Rating 29%
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Ranked #3,111
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Genres / Traits: Horror Natural Horror Kaiju Sharks

Connections: Shark Attack

When two researchers discover a colossal shark's tooth off the Mexican coast their worst fears surface - the most menacing beast to ever rule the waters is still alive and mercilessly feeding on anything that crosses its path. Now they must hunt the fierce killer and destroy it... before there is no one left to stop it. --TMDb
John Barrowman
John Barrowman
Jenny McShane
Jenny McShane
Ryan Cutrona
Ryan Cutrona
Bashar Rahal
Bashar Rahal
George Stanchev
George Stanchev
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Review by Chad
Added: May 31, 2012
Here it is: Shark Attack 3: Megalodon, perhaps one of the most famous (or infamous) of all "bad shark movies." After a string of bad movies, I finally got to part three and "the line", which is easily one of the best lines in all of cinematic history. I'm not going to spoil it in this review, but trust me when I say that it makes every other line of dialogue ever written look weak in comparison. As for the surrounding movie, well... if you like cheesy b-movies and if you're a fan of the type of material that The Asylum puts out, you'll love this.

With zero ties to the previous movies, Part 3 takes place off the coast of Mexico, where we discover than an evil corporation is laying fiber-optic cables on the sea floor to connect the various continents in ways that have never been done before. Based on the way that the internet is portrayed in the film, I'm guessing that the filmmakers hasn't heard of it. Anyway, the electromagnetic pulses sent out by these cables attract a couple of megalodons out of the deep sea trenches, and it doesn't take long before these beasts start chowing down on anything in their path.

It starts out innocently enough with a fifteen-footer, but come to find out, that was the baby - the mama is about sixty feet long and can swallow a jet ski in a single gulp. Of course, the mayor won't close the beaches (do they ever?) and nobody will listen to the voice of reason, so it will be up to patrol guard Ben Carpenter (John Barrowman), museum curator Cataline Stone (Jenny McShane), and retired Navy officer Chuck Rampart (Ryan Cutrona) to put an end to these prehistoric monsters... and maybe watch a little I Love Lucy when all is said and done.

You can say a lot of negative things about this movie, but you can't call it boring. Finally, someone figured out that in order to make a good shark movie, you need to give the sharks plenty of attention. Funny how that works, isn't it? Sure, there's the obligatory love connection and there's also the bit about the crooked company, but these are minor parts in a movie that spends the majority of its time either showing the sharks tearing shit up, or leading into a scene where the sharks can tear shit up. Really, that's all we want, and this movie delivered it.

Now, I did say that the movie is cheesy and that it is along the lines of something that The Asylum would put out, and that is true. The special effects are a little lackluster, and the actual shark attacks aren't exactly cutting-edge technology. The mini-megalodon attacks are done with the usual splicing of stock shark footage and footage of people flailing in the water, while the big boy is brought to life by putting footage of the crew up against a blown-up version of a great white. It actually looks pretty good the first time that you see it, but when they repeat the process a dozen times, it does lose some of its charm.

The storyline is goofy and filled with unintentionally hilarious moments, while the acting is... well, the reason for "the line" was to get some kind of reaction out of the stiff-as-a-board leading lady. Even an unscripted ad lib couldn't do it, if that tells you anything. Ryan Cutrona is alright in his role, but only because he realized how corny the movie was and hammed up every scene that he was in. A few other people do the same from time to time, but this was the only guy who was really cranking it up, and thus, worth watching.

With all that said, Shark Attack 3 is definitely a bad movie... but it's also one of those movies that is enjoyable as all hell. If you enjoyed Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus or pretty much anything else that The Asylum has released over the years, you'll enjoy this one roughly the same amount. Even if you just want to see some sharks tearing people to pieces and can deal with the fact that it's a cheesy b-movie that is ultra low budget and doesn't have much else going for it, I think that you'll get a kick out of it - maybe not "love" it, but definitely get a kick out of it. 7/10.
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