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Big Boobs, Blonde Babes, Bad Blood (2004)

DVD Cover (Alter Ego Cinema)
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Overall Rating 75%
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Ranked #13,006
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Choosing to capture his bizarre thoughts and feelings on camera (instead of creating horrifying events in real life), director Shane Ryan risked the reputation in his home town of being a "civilized" person and created a world of unique and unusual images focusing on sex and violence. BIG BOOBS, BLONDE BABES, BAD BLOOD takes a look at Ryan's films, statements and behind-the-scenes footage. --IMDb
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Review by Chad
Added: July 14, 2006
In a sense, Big Boobs, Blonde Babes, Bad Blood is a documentary on the relatively short career of director / writer Shane Ryan. Found within this two hour presentation are a number of his short films, some of which last only a minute or two while others run for the "whopping" time of fifteen minutes. Also included are a number of behind the scenes segments, including a making-of presentation centered around one of his short films. His logic for this is solid; when you watch a making-of presentation for a film such as Pearl Harbor or Titanic, it really doesn't do a whole lot for the potential movie-makers out there, considering the fact that the budgets for these films is ungodly high. When you watch how a guy with no budget was able to put together a film, it could definitely help those of you who have contemplated putting some sort of story in front of the camera; however, it's also interesting for those of us who have no desire to do such, as it's neat to see what filmmakers today can do with some imagination.

The meat of the presentation, of course, is the short films themselves. While the behind-the-scenes stuff is included, the films themselves take up the vast majority of the running time, and that was a good thing. The movies are introduced by one of three hostesses - Vanessa Ross (Bikini Planet, Hotties), Rebecca Elizabeth Stevens (Slaughterhouse Phi: Death Sisters), and April Wade (Day Of The Dead 2: Contagium) - after which, director Shane Ryan gives a small insight into what his motivation for creating each film was. It's a formula that works with these collection of films, as listening to both the ladies and Ryan himself discussing the films was just as entertaining as the films themselves.

I'm not going to attempt to give my thoughts on each short film included here as some only run for a minute total, while others really have to be seen for yourself. I will say, however, that the vast majority of them were quality pieces of work, especially the one entitled So, We Killed Our Parents. In this segment, a teenage brother and sister pair decide to retaliate against their abusive parents by, as the title implies, killing them. After the murder is done, we find out that the two share more than just the normal brother and sister love, ending with an incestuous scene that is sure to leave the audience squirming in one way or another (depending on how perverted you are). Another film focuses on a young man who has overdosed on drugs while his girlfriend does her best to keep him from passing out in what ends with a pretty touching scene. The film is chock-full of exploitation material - blood, boobs, and a couple of blonde babes - but don't be suckered into thinking that that is the extent of the material found here, as director Shane Ryan shows that he is skilled in more than one style of film.

There are a few duds to be found, but these particular ones fail because of the length. For example, the opening film (Lucifer's Mind) shows a nude woman smearing blood all over her nude body while clips of a rock band are spliced in. This goes on for about a minute, and then the credits roll. Was this interesting to watch? Sure, but it's far from an entertaining film. Some more material in the films such as these probably would have helped, but that negative is also a positive; since they're so short, it's not as if you're wasting an hour of your life on something that isn't, in my opinion, quality entertainment.

In the end, though, this is definitely worth a purchase for the indie movie fans. It has some nice horror films included, there's some good ol' exploitation material to be found, there are some truly great visuals to be seen, and a few of the stories are downright touching - Isolation was my personal favorite in that regard. If you're expecting a Troma gorefest or a Seduction Cinema T&A release, look elsewhere; however, if you're looking for some quality independent cinema, this would be a damned fine place to start. 7/10.
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